This morning, I had a dream. It wasn't prophetic, in fact, it was rather stupid. Because of it, though, I woke up very thankful that Chris and I had been sealed in the temple. We had been married, and we had set a date to be sealed, but we weren't there yet. Instead of our little two-bedroom apartment, we lived in a cottage on the edge of a cranberry bog, and our neighbors were J.K. Rowling and Martha Stewart. The morning of our sealing, my dear friend and favored Elder shows up on my doorstep all anxious because he has to tell me something. "Kate! I have to tell you..." and at this moment, Chris' alarm went off, which is currently "I Like to Move it, Move it"
Really, Steven. I don't CARE if you like to bust a move every once in a while... don't we all?
The Christmas season can be a difficult time for me. Since I grew up Catholic, I'm used to a lot of emphasis being placed on symbols. I miss Advent, and was unable to stop myself from purchasing an Advent calendar this year. At least I didn't give in to the wreath, right? I'm very grateful indeed that Christmas falls on a Sunday and that we will be having Sacrament. I loved participating in as many Christmas services as I could; it helped me to put things in perspective.
As a convert, around what would be considered high holy days in the Catholic Church, I have to consistently remind myself of all I have gained as a result of my conversion. I often think of the Christmas before I joined the Church. I was very active in the ward, and everyone was wondering when I would be baptized. I remember being early, and walking into the chapel and just sitting there. There was a table of poinsettias in front of the stand, and they looked so pretty... it was just enough to remind me of the simplicity and purity of the gospel.
Occasionally, I pay homage to my Catholic roots in little, silly ways; I buy Pazcki and eat more seafood during Lent, not because I feel I should, but because it's what I enjoy. Cheap little Advent calendars find their way into my home because they remind me of my childhood. Every once in a while, I take out my Rosary and use it to count my blessings. My husband calls me a Mormolic.
My Heavenly Father knows me, and I know He understands how difficult it was for me to leave the Catholic Church. He also understands the depth of my testimony and how completely I love His Church. He knows, too, that I spent a great deal of my lifetime considering monastic life as a Carmelite nun, and how much I yearn for structure in my life as wife and someday mother in a world in which I never really pictured myself living.
In this, the week of Christmas, I rededicate myself. I'm not going to put it off until New Year's, it's happening now. I would really appreciate some advice, however, on how to incorporate some order into my life. As it stands, I exist in chaos. I am going to be a better wife, a better member of this Church, and I am going to prepare myself for the day when I become a mother. Please join me in the journey.
As for you, dear reader, may the peace of Christ be with you, now and always.
Check out the Book of Mormon Forum's Christmas Blog Hop here!